I don’t know why this dog is the beer dog but it is, if it was my dog I would train it to get beers. but wait I don’t drink so maybe it would be the lemonade dog, I had a short story I was going to post but I have to get on the road and work stress has been getting me down lately so I havne’t really been in the mood to write. Enjoy the lemonade dog.
From Seth’s Blog:
A friend of mine has just set up a backpacker hotel in Melbourne. In order to get backpackers to talk about their hotel here is the free-prize they came up with… GIRLS!… if they could attract girls to the backpacker hotel then the boys would follow.
So they went to great lengths setting up girls dorms and private rooms with good security and -get this- pamper packs (moisturizer, masks, and other girly stuff). The boys dorms were pretty standard military affairs. The result was girls were checking in in droves to use the facilities… and the boys followed… as did the local boys as well hoping to get some Swedish loving.
So the place is packed out simply because of some hair products, face cream and foreign girls.
Now would the reverse work ? Could you setup big screen tvs with ESPN, pool tables, and a couple of strippers to attract the boys and hope the girls would follow ? somehow I don’t think that would work.
I have a broken fish. I don’t know how this happend well ok I lied I do know how it happend. I was at the fishstore getting Sushi a new roomate and when the clerk asked me which fish I wanted I just waved to a tank and said that one. Obviously taking me for a chump they unloaded their freak fish on me.
So the plan is later tonight Mr. Axe and Mr. Clerk will get to know each other. No one sells me a broken fish and gets away with it. But I am still stuck in Ginger over here who is crosseyed. Usually I would just flush him down the toilet and get a new one but in this case I think I will make an exception. The other night I saw Sushi and Ginger plotting to get the fish food. That’s good if Sushi is plotting to get the fish food then he won’t spend as much time thinking about communism.
Beside Ginger Sushi now has a another roomate which I have named Gump, Gump is as stupid as stupid does. I was going to name him something food related but he’s honestly the dumbest fish I have ever seen. Gump makes Ginger look like a friggen space scientist. Don’t worry I’ll post pictures of Gump in the near future.
So the answer came back NO. I can keep my 75k and they can keep their degree, although I can always fake it and say I do have an MBA, I mean I have a BS and no one except my insurance agent has ever checked on that. Who would check the MBA ? On the plus side I am still a legend in my own mind.
Feeling a bit down after getting the NO letter I did what any other normal person would do. I called a friend who was asleep, there’s really nothing so cheerful as waking a good friend up especially if they are supremely hung over. Thank you Wenyu, the words “umm grhm hung over mhhm ughh sleep me need gah time early” never sounded so good.
Next I called up my little sister and I emphsize the little part. Hoping for someone to commiserate with instead I got a different treatment. This is how the conversation went.
“hey, so I heard back from them, they said no”
“oh well, did you really apply yourself ? I mean you didn’t really study that hard, you could have gotten a higher GMAT score, you know people who are serious about this take prep classes…”
“umm I scored in the top 11%, I spent 2 months studying for that stupid test”
“oh yeah, you did study well, really what were you going to do with the MBA anyways ? What was your plan ?”
“see I was gonna get the MBA then I was going to buy an apartment in a high tower in Singapore with a beach house in a nearby island for weekend getaways. Then I was going to buy a condo in Manhattan oh and you were going to live in the condo, but I was going to have a room there for my visits to NY, you know for business purposes when my Leer jet would fly me to the states”
“yeah that’s great so how was getting an MBA going to help you achieve this ?”
“ well I figured a lot of power lunches, and power naps. Power dinners maybe ? I’d read some reports and sign a lot of documents maybe do a little yelling I am really good at power naps I can take a ton of them”
“yeah yeah but what would you actually be doing”
“look I was busy figuring out where I would have mistresses and condos, I can’t be bothered about what I would be doing, I figure I’d just swing it”
“swing it ? That was your brilliant plan ? 3 years of school, 75k of money and then you were going to swing it ? Are you kidding me ? Ok clearly this is not going to work, we need to get you a career coach what were you thinking”
meanwhile I am trying to get a word in.
“is this phone working, I mean I think I was talking, I know it’s a VoIP phone but still….”
“oh stop your whining you didn’t even have a plan”
“just for that you are not getting a condo, it’s a loft now”
rolls her eyes
“hey how did you roll your eyes over the phone ? Stop that”
“there there little brother, everything will be better”
“all I wanted out of life is a cookie, a good solid oatmeal cookie and a few mistresses and a couple of houses is that too much to ask ?”
“fine fine, stop wallowing in self pity”
“no, I am good at it, why should I stop ? And you know what else ? I don’t fit into the cool faded jeans anymore, ever since I started running my legs have gotten huge so I don’t fit into those faded jeans anymore. I am a freak of nature now, not only am I not smart I don’t fit into regular cloths anymore. Just put a circus around me and charge admission”
“that’s it, I am going to bed, you just need to snap out of it, I’ll schedule a career coach for you”
“umm weren’t you supposed to be the little one ?”
They grow up so fast
I’ve started to drink while I am in planes not out of any particular desire to get drunk but rather out of fear that my free coupons will expire and I will have missed out on something important. The funny thing is I don’t even like to drink anymore. Sure I’ll have the occasional beer or shot of vodka with co-workers or clients but I’ve come to the conclusion that I just don’t like alcohol.
Currently there are 3 bottles of top notch sake sitting in my fridge. I haven’t touched them in months, same with the pricey bottle of wine I bought after I saw Sideways. Looking back on my drinking career I can honestly say there was never a drink I really liked outside of its social setting. Belgian beers are great with sourkraut and German sausages, wine goes nicely with friends and Italian food while a good time is had by all when you mix sushi, sake and Sapporo. But frankly I dislike wine, beer and sake. The free coupons are forcing me to down a Heiniken right now.
Another one of the great Southwest perks is the companion pass, if you fly something like 70 times in one year then you get a companion pass which means you can take a regular flight to any Southwest destination and take a friend with you for free. Combine that with the free southwest flight coupons and that means you can fly two people for free. But frankly just like with alcohol I’d prefer to not fly at all. What does it matter that you fly for free when you only have 2 weeks of vacation a year. You hoard up the hours each week on your paycheck waiting to build up enough time to take a decent vacation. And really when you want to take a decent vacation you won’t be flying anywhere Southwest flies to so at the end it’s a moot point.
Now I’d like to take a moment and point out a few things that are just wrong. Let’s start out with the two week vacation, it’s just wrong Europeans get 6 weeks of vacation a year. 1 ½ months of paid time off. No wonder they don’t have any serial killers running around, who has time to kill people when you have a month and a half of vacation time ? Next the softcover book, it used to be that you had a hardcover book that cost $24 and a softcover version that was $6-$7, now it seems that publishers have killed off the softcover version and go with a medium version that is softcover but larger than the old paperbacks. These new horrors cost $16, which is bull shit, they have neither the solid feel of the old hardcover books nor the easy to fit size of the old paperbacks.
Now the flight attendant just came by and took away my can of Heiniken and I had only drank half of it. Damn it I wasted a coupon.
So in order to use nice little links on the title of the blog I need to anchor each to a post. So here we go for the About one. The Lost Dodo is located in the SF bay for now.
Methods of contact are:
Contact me on Yahoo Messenger: sanfub33@yahoo.com
Contact me on MSN: sanfub33@yahoo.com
Contact me on AOL Instant Messenger: asad23
Contact me on Skype: asad24
Email me: asadba@gmail.com
Sara Racey Tabrizi
Xposed: He has a gorgeous daughter. Was he flipping out because of your Persian background?
Sara: In that culture, men are very protective of women, especially fathers over their daughters. If I went to Iran right now, I would have to wear a head scarf and all that kind of stuff. I have so much love, admiration and respect for Persian culture. I was raised by an American mother as a Catholic in the inner city. I have a really weird life. My mom lived in Iran for two years, and during the Islamic revolution with the Ayatollah Khomeni, she had to escape with me in her stomach. She had to conceal it because if they found out she was pregnant with a Persian daughter, she would have been kept there. My mom refuses to see that movie “Not Without My Daughter” because the story reminds her so much of what she went through.
Xposed: How can you have positive feelings toward that kind of oppressive culture where you could never have realized your dream of modeling?
Sara: It’s historical. You can’t just say they need to change because American society is the way it is. A lot of Persian women like the way the culture is. It’s church and state together, not separate like here in America. You live your religion. That goes back hundreds and hundreds of years and can’t just change overnight. I respect it and will never dishonor it. I will never go to Iran and pose nude in the streets. But here in America, you have the freedom to do that.
So you want to steal music but you don’t wan to get caught. There are a lot of different ways you can accomplish this and really no one is going to come after you in the dead of night. Just make sure you don’t keep a huge library online at all times. Oh and this is only for broadband users, if you are on a dialup well I am sure your vcr and record players are more than enough technology for you. You don’t need to worry about mp3s.
Grokster is first in the list of p2p applications, they are currently in the supreme court with MGM so for now you can use them without any worry. They are however ad-ware unless you pay and really if you were going to pay you would have just bought cds.
Winmx is next, they are free and easy to use but you have to let it run for about an hour for best results. The longer it runs the more sources it will have to search.
Limewire is just another p2p application, again they would like you to pay to get rid of the adds. Somehow these guys think you have extra money.
Of course there’s also bittorrent which is good for downloading movies, dvd burners and other applications. Beware many of the applications you download will be infected with viruses so really it’s not worth it outside of movies.
Finally my favorite way of getting mp3s, you have to first consider how much is your time worth, is it worth while to spend an hour of your time tracking down 3 songs ? You save what $3 if you had bought them from Apple. Well personally I would prefer to pay $0.20 or less per track and here is where Russia comes in handy. Scary, full of hackers Russia. Allofmp3.com uses a loophole in Russian law to sell mp3s (or other formats) super cheap. No worries about viruses or anything else, however you might be worried about handing our your credit card number to scary people in Russia, well so far I haven’t had any problems with them but then again I use a virtual credit card number.
Citibank has a cool feature that lets you generate a one time use credit card number that expires in 30 days. The Russian hackers are more than welcome to this one time use credit card number. American Express used to have a similar feature but they discontinued it (bastards).
Well I didn’t get any Canadian bud in the mail, I guess those of you who had it were not sharing. I can understand it’s good stuff and you want to keep it all to yourself. Fine be that way. Just for that this is a picture from the top of my apartment complex. If I was willing to pay $2800 a month I could have a 2 bedroom 2 bath apartment with this view. Kick ass isn’t it ?
But I did get two sticky guys from Estelle, who was kind enough to share them. She had a gaggle of them ( and yes a bunch of sticky guys is called a gaggle). So I took the sticky guys to work with me. Everyone should have a sticky guy with them, unfortunately I don’t know where to get sticky guys otherwise I would have 288 sticky guys like Estelle.
In other news my body is fucking with me for no reason at all, well I told it to get in shape and now it wakes me up at 5:45 every single day, even on weekends. Damn you body. I will get even with you somehow.
